For the Gram

“How does my pic look”

“Does this filter make my lips look fuller”

“Does this angle make me have a double chin”

“Do I look like I have rolls rather than curves”

'"No, take it again. I don't like how I look"

Have you ever heard of the above? Or something similar. Or have you asked your besties anything of the sort?

Wait sorry. Hello Baes. But no, seriously. I bet there is not one single soul out there that hasn’t asked their friends, family or colleagues how they look in a picture. Or whether or not it is “acceptable” to go on Instagram. (Before you say anything, it's just an expression).

I’m sorry, but I can't. What? Come again! Acceptable? Can you hear me SHOUTING THROUGH THIS POST. Acceptable for who, for what? A social media platform. Which should be used to post memorable aspects of your life or something that gives you that happy factor. 

In this situation, no individual can be blamed for even thinking what if. Why you ask? It’s all because of media and social media itself. All we see in media now is how amazing Kim K’s figure is, how flat is a new mothers stomach, the constant full lips trend, eyebrows being on fleek. Using a waist trainer to get that snatched tiny waist. Or how shredded you can get your six pack.

We are constantly reminded what is “perfection” or “acceptable” in the eyes of media. Yes, there are movements now, that encourage us, the world, to accept any flaws, like stretch marks, scarring, being thick. But that doesn’t cover the image portrayed by media.

I for a fact have done the above. I have asked my peers if my post is good enough to be on instagram, or taken almost hundreds of selfies to compare which pose or angle makes me look good. Some may argue that it doesn’t bother them or are not comfortable accepting that they do have insecurities. 

I had new colleague that started at my work place and she has an amazing figure! But it was really upsetting for me, as another colleague was comparing herself to her. And she was upset that she didn't have certain features. That’s the thing with genetics we are born with features, some that we love and some that we may want to change. 

Media makes us dislike features that may have been a little thing at the back of our heads. I hear females wanting to get lip fillers because their top lips are small, or males feeling lesser of a man because they cannot grow a beard. But why can't we love ourselves, and love what we have been blessed with. 

It is easier said than done. I look at the selfies of myself, or the pictures from a night out. And if I see a blemish or my skin looking textured. I feel disgusted. I wish that my skin would be clearer and smooth. I would never put a photo up on social media if you could see something that wasn't good enough for the gram. Or I wouldn't like the way my figure looked, especially if it was next to a slimmer individual. 

Although I, or you may think or notice your "flaws", that is not what others see. I have had make up artists compliment my scarred skin, because my skin felt well looked after and hydrated. Or other females compliment my figure and them saying they wished for it. 

Ask yourself what is the definition of perfection. What does it mean to you? According to the Cambridge dictionary, the definition of perfection is "the state of being complete and correct in every way". 

So how can you measure perfection? There is no quantifying measure for it. In one’s eyes, being in the countryside wearing wellingtons is perfection. In another being in the urban city keeping up with the fashion trends can be perfection. We all have opinions and there will be a number of us who will look at the same thing and think ahhh perfection. My mum has always said no five fingers are the same. 

The saying simply means one key doesn't fit all. 

As an individual you need to work on yourself to love yourself. And be mindful of what you say to an individual, if they ask for your opinion. Don't hinder their confidence by being shocked negatively like, "oh shit your skin was bad", or "whoa you were big". 

No. Stop.

Encourage one another to love themselves. Encourage one another to keep going if they have a goal to reach. That is one way we will be able to break this cloud of social media perfection. 

Lots of Love,

Pri xo